Not as Bad as I Thought
by idontlikegravy
Summary: Highlander the Raven fic. After time to think things through, Nick Wolfe returns to Paris and Amanda.


_Disclaimer: None of it is mine, not one little bit, or the show wouldn't have been cancelled._

**Not As Bad As I Thought It Would Be**

_So, Immortality. After everything I've been through with Amanda, everything I'd seen her go through, I really thought it would suck monumentally. But, actually, not so much. I'm less pissed at her for making me Immortal, but I am still pissed at her choosing for me. It's not like I didn't know what was involved. _

_What she did was unbelievably selfish. Well, okay, I know what you're thinking: It's Amanda, she's always selfish. And you'd be right, to a point. I guess I should be flattered that she wants me around for eternity. Actually… I hadn't thought of it like that, I kinda see her point of view. There was no way to save me, and she didn't want to lose me…_

_But still, I'm not a kid, I knew about Immortality, about the Game. Didn't I deserve to choose for myself? And she knew how I felt about the Game, about killing. I'm not like Liam, I'm not the type to hide on Holy Ground forever and she knew that too. She condemned me to this existence without a second thought. _

Nick growled and paced the floor of his apartment. He'd thought things through a thousand times, but he was more confused than ever. It was time to go back, to set things straight.

After leaving Amanda in that factory, he'd left Paris, needing time and distance to think about things.

He hadn't been stupid; he'd gone back to the bar and stolen one of Amanda's swords to take with him. He figured she owed him, and she'd probably appreciate the irony of him stealing from her. He didn't want to fight in the Game, but he did want to be prepared if he ran into another Immortal.

That had been a decade ago, and Nick couldn't believe how fast it had passed. He knew now that Amanda had been right, that time passed differently for them. _For us, _he corrected himself. He still wasn't used to being a part of her club.

Thankfully he'd only been near three Immortals in the last decade. He didn't realise what he was feeling the first time, but luckily for him they were on Holy Ground. From then on, each time he'd felt the presence of another, he'd left town. The Game couldn't catch him if he kept moving.

Amanda had been right; he'd changed in ways he'd never expected. He was still Nick Wolfe, but now he was Nick Wolfe, Immortal. He'd visited parts of the world he would never have contemplated; taken the time to see them properly, learn the language. In just ten years he'd added a fluency in Spanish, German, Italian and Japanese to the French he knew before. He hated to admit it to himself, but he was beginning to enjoy his Immortality.

He was still pretty much the same guy though, and that meant that he was drawn to danger. He continued to throw himself into situations without regard for personal safety, more so now he knew he wouldn't be hurt. A week didn't go by that he didn't charge into a burning building to rescue a trapped child, or dive into a lake to rescue a drowning puppy, or some other act of heroism. The only reason he wasn't plastered all over the papers was that he always moved on, leaving before cops and reporters showed to ask too many questions.

After a year, he noticed a young man following him. The man was certainly mortal, and Nick realised that he must be a Watcher. His Watcher. He wasn't sure if that was funny or if it creeped him out. He began to surreptitiously watch his Watcher, and soon he was able to confirm the presence of a Watcher tattoo. Satisfied that he wasn't an enemy, Nick left him to his own devices. After a while, he found it comforting to know that he had a companion, even if they never spoke.

Finally, Nick had calmed down enough to go back to speak to Amanda. He couldn't stay out of the Game forever, and who else was going to train him? Liam was out of practice, and it wouldn't be fair to the man who had sworn to leave the Game behind.

He arrived in Paris and headed straight for Liam's church. He still didn't know if Amanda was in Paris or, if she was, exactly what to say to her. He hoped the Immortal priest might have some wisdom to impart to him.

Nick felt the presence of an Immortal a few seconds before he heard the steady thump of a basketball, and felt a surge of warmth as he realised Liam was still there. He hadn't realised until now how much he'd missed him, or how much Paris had felt like home.

Nick saw Liam look up to find the source of the Buzz, so he waved his hand in greeting. Liam smiled and nodded before returning to his lone practise. Taking that for an invitation, Nick laid his jacket on a bench, carefully covering the sword concealed inside, and joined the game.

"So, the prodigal returns," Liam quipped, passing Nick the ball.

"You don't seem surprised," Nick answered, dribbling and shooting the ball. The ball entered the net, and was caught by Liam.

"That you came back or that you're Immortal?" Liam said, bouncing the ball between his hands. Without waiting for an answer, he continued, "I knew when I met you that you had the potential to be Immortal. And I knew you couldn't stay away from her forever," he finished with a grin. Nick lunged forward to take the ball, but Liam swept it high and to the goal. It hit the rim and bounced off, and Nick leapt to grab it before Liam. He tucked the ball under his arm and faced Liam.

"I thought about giving it a damn good try," he replied, a little breathless. Liam smiled.

"She is the most infuriating of women, I'll give you that. But nobody can stay mad at Amanda for long, not even MacLeod."

"MacLeod?" Nick asked, eyebrow raised.

"Not the issue right now, Nick. Ask Amanda if you're that interested. Although, I can't think for the life of me why you would be," Liam replied, amused. Nick glowered at him.

"So, is she in Paris?" Nick asked. Liam nodded. "Could you arrange a meet?"

"Why? Do you need to meet on Holy Ground?" Liam asked, shocked. It was Nick's turn to be amused, and he shook his head.

"I just figured she wouldn't take my call. And I didn't think I had any right to show up, out of the blue, after all this time," Nick said, picking up his jacket. Liam nodded his understanding and led Nick into the church and back to his office. He offered Nick a seat and went to the phone, but Nick remained standing, pacing the floor nervously.

"You know, she was worried sick after you left. And she felt so guilty about what she'd done. Came to me for penance," Liam said. Nick wasn't sure how to respond to that.

"Whose fault was it I was in danger? She acted selfishly, Liam."

"I'm not denying that, Nick. I'm just saying that, she's Amanda; she acts first, thinks later. She thought she was doing the right thing. I know that doesn't make it better, and you have every right to be angry with her, but are you going to waste centuries being mad at her?" Liam said. Nick began to answer, then shrugged and finally sat down. Liam picked up the phone and dialled. "Amanda? Hello. Nick's back, we're at my church…yes he's here…he just showed up now, he…" Liam removed the receiver from his ear and looked at it before replacing it in the cradle. "She hung up, I think she's on her way."

"I still don't know what to say to her. And I can never forget that she's the one who knowingly brought me into the Game," Nick said, rubbing his temple.

"And she hasn't forgotten or forgiven herself that sin. She did it out of love, Nick. She's been Immortal 1000 years, she thinks of it as a gift. A gift with a catch, but what gift doesn't have that? She couldn't stand to let you die, doesn't that mean anything?" Liam answered.

"I…I think I love her, but how can I give that a chance when there can be only One?"

"Who says? If, in the end, only you, her and me were left, would you really fight us? I certainly wouldn't, and I'm pretty sure Amanda wouldn't either," Liam said. Nick began to protest, but Liam raised a hand to stop him. "Let me tell you about two Immortals, Gina and Robert de Valicourt. They've been married for over three hundred years and are still very much in love. Now I'm not suggesting that kind of relationship is for you and Amanda. Far from it in fact. Neither one of you is the type to settle down for too long. But you compliment each other; balance each other in a way few people ever get. Immortal life isn't much different from mortal life, just hopefully a little longer. You have to take chances where you can if you want to be happy."

"Are you done dispensing platitudes, Father?" Nick said with a smile. Just then they both felt the approach of another Immortal, and stood up.

"It would seem so. Just think about what I said, and try not to be too hard on her, please?" Liam said and left the room. A few moments later, Amanda walked through the door. Her hair was no longer blonde, instead it was jet black. Her skin was pale against it and she looked tired.

She stood in the doorway, stock still, staring at Nick, lost for words. As he looked at her, all the recriminations, all the anger dissipated and he was just glad to see her. He closed the distance between them in two long strides and swept her into a kiss. She returned it, passionately, until they had to break for air. Then she slapped him. He stepped back, clutching his cheek.

"What was that for?" he said.

"For making me worry. You could have been killed, you bastard," she said, the tears welling in her eyes somewhat lessening her indignation. Nick tried hard not to chuckle.

"Shouldn't I be the one getting mad?" he said softly. Amanda choked back a sob.

"I'm sorry, Nick. You were right; I had no right to do that to you. But I couldn't bear to think of the world without you in it. I admit, I acted selfishly, but I…" she stopped, unable to finish the sentence and looked at the floor.

Nick wasn't sure if she couldn't say the words because she was embarrassed, or because she was scared he didn't feel the same.

"I can't forget what you did Amanda. But I have forgiven you," he said. She looked into his eyes, offering him a tentative smile. He returned one of his own and gently kissed her again. "Besides, who else was going to train me?" he said playfully. Amanda stepped back and slapped him on the arm. "Ow!"

"I was really worried you know. I even asked Dawson to put a Watcher on you and feed me reports," Amanda told him as they walked out to find Liam.

"So that's how they found me, I was wondering. You should tell Dawson that the man he assigned is pretty useless at tailing someone. I spotted him the first day," Nick said.

"Be fair Nick, most Immortals don't have the kind of training you have," Amanda reasoned.

"True," Nick agreed. He wrapped his arm around her waist, drawing her closer and asked, conspiratorially, "By the way, Amanda, who's MacLeod?"


End file.
